Two vivid childhood memories always come to mind for me. One day when I was 9 I was enjoying a ride in the car with my father when the news came over the radio that the body of a 14-year-old Negro boy named Emmett Till had been found after he’d been brutally tortured and lynched in Mississippi. My father, who had been smiling cheerfully a moment earlier as we drove past a pond full of ducks, had a look on his face I had never seen before. He was trying not to cry in front of me. As he choked up he looked at me and said, “Sometimes I’m ashamed to be white.” A happier memory is of a sunny afternoon when I was around the same age and my father took me to Ebbets Field to see the Brooklyn Dodgers play. He pointed to Jackie Robinson and said, “That man is very special. One day you will understand and I want you to remember.” Thank you for embarking on this project, Helen. Only good can come from education and dialogue. I suggest that Joy DeGruy be “required reading” for Race 101 (especially for white folks). There are some great clips on Youtube. A good sample is the one called A Trip to the Grocery Store from her film Cracking the Codes: The System of Racial Inequity.
Michael, Thanks for sharing your stories. Your experiences led you to become a conscious, open-minded, caring individual who is committed to justice; and who raised daughters who embody that same spirit. I am thankful to call you a friend, and honored to have taught two of your girls. I feel it is so critical to have honest, "gut-wrenchingly" honest conversations about race across diverse lines. We all have to look at life through multiple lenses to even begin to understand different experiences. I really hope this blog stimulates dialogue, and becomes a platform for sharing information and resources!! Thanks for the youtube suggestions. Peace!!
Helen thank you for inviting me!!! WOW Michael Kaufman your story touch me I have a very similar story from the same time. I was 4 maybe 5 years old playing on the kitchen floor as I always did and my mother was in the living room watching TV I heard her scream oh my god I ran to the living room to see her crying President John F Kennedy had just been assassinated I started to cry because my family spoke very highly of this man black Americans love him he was a very decent human being in my home there were several adults and as a child I would frequently hear them talking about Martin Luther King the civil rights movement voting President Kennedy Malcolm X and as a young child I became aware of these people and what they did what they stood for and what they meant so it also touched me very deeply I believe in my heart today some fifty years later Kennedy part of the reason he was assassinated what he was going to go against the powers that be and sign in to affect the civil rights bill what he was going to do a lot more than that so they got rid of him the only way to shut him up was to assassinate him!!! not during that era we will hung from trees we had dogs attack us we were treated like s*** spit upon not allowed to eat in certain restaurants not allowed to drink from certain water fountains certain place we went to we had to use the back door we were not allowed to go to the front door as I said some things have changed not a great deal of change we are still treated as second-class citizens and what's worse we are being shot in the street in numbers that I ridiculous it is a sign of blatant racism and all police departments all across the country driving while black has become a popular phrase because it is a real thing I myself have been stopped several times not having done anything wrong but because I am Black!!! how this can be changed that's why I'm here hopefully we can come together and find a solution!!! I think it should start with the rulers of all land our politicians the people we elected into office who we trust to have a best interest at heart its not that way congressman and senators should be allowed only a two year term the Supreme Court judges should only be allowed a five-year term!!! we should start there that's my opinion all police officers should be scrutinized when they act unbecoming to the public they should be penalized they should go to jail just as anyone else would if the law has been broken and they break the law quite frequently!!! hopefully in this blog we can collectively come together and make some kind of change that is my prayer and I will continue to hold on to that hope and that dream
I consider myself fortunate when I was a infant my mother was a domestic worker in Englewood Cliffs she work for a German Jew not a very nice man but his wife was a very sweet woman I have known her into my adulthood!!! my mother didn't have a babysitter and many times she would take me to work with her the woman of the housealso had twins a boy and the girl these two little white children for babies where my playmates I played with them all day long up until kindergarten when we played together we had a lot of fun they even had sleepovers at the house where I was the only black person in the house these are my friends my playmates so for my early age I did not know racism and I don't have it in my spirit today I find myself very fortunate to have grown up in that environment I think God because if not I have no idea how I would feel towards white people today I don't have any racism in me there are some black people I can't stand there are some people I don't like but all in all I don't consider that racism because I don't look at their color of their skin
Charles, Thanks for your response and honesty! I too remember my parents reactions (sad, mad, worried) when Malcolm X, President Kennedy, Martin Luther King Jr., Bobby Kennedy & Medgar Evans were all assassinated! The Kennedy brothers were recognized as White people who cared and were willing to make a difference for Black people. We lost so many good people in that era. My parents raised us to know we were just as good as the next person, and to be able to stand eye to eye and face anyone, and I thank them immensely for that teaching. My family and I have endured our share (more than I care to remember) of driving while Black stops & police brutality at the hands of White officers. Yet, I still treat people as individuals & work to build bridges across diverse lines! I like your ideas about terms for elected officials and judges. I also think police officers should have to live in the community where they work (not just the city). Finally regarding race, in reality there is only one race - human and we all evolved from Africans - which has been anthropologically documented - Lucy (the oldest bones) was a Black, African woman!! I hope this blog will get people talking - which is the first step towards addressing issues!
AMEN!!! I have often wondered had those men who are not assassinated during that era had all the ads to be elderly men today our country would be a lot different it would still be some hatred but it would be I don't know the words to use it will be I'll just say a better place I believe that in my heart those men we're not evil men!!! every name you mentioned were men of integrity we're men of consciousnesswere men who cares for their fellow man!!!
No judgment on spelling, grammar or typing errors - the content is what counts! I too believe our country would be a better place if those great men and many women too had lived (Fannie Lou Hamer to name one) and were able to work together for the cause of freedom, justice & equality! However, I believe in a higher power and there are no accidents - so things were meant to unfold with divine timing! I believe we are on the brink of a new world order!!!
Please feel free to invite people to join this dialogue!
yes a new world order!!! my question ordered by who??? and my sincere apology they were many great women in the struggle and they're still out today what can I leave you ladies out had it not been for you ladies I will not be here!!! LOL
Nicole, I agree racially and culturally in some respects we have made progress, but we have a long way to go. Today resegregation is occurring in schools all over the US; and Black and Hispanic students are more and more isolated in low-income, racially segregated schools. In all major cities of America the rates of segregation are close to what they were in the early 60’s. I firmly believe until everyone can experience the same freedom, justice, and equality than none of us are truly free. In terms of the link you posted, it is an absolute shame! I see links and posts of police brutality and race-targeted crimes daily. (In fact, my family and I have experienced it more times than I care to remember). People nationwide/worldwide are tired of the blatant disparity and racist treatment, and banning together to express their outrage in a variety of ways. I think a major movement is emerging that will demand - not suggest - but demand a wide-sweeping, revolutionary change of the "system" in this country. I don't think it will come easy and I anticipate there will be a heavy price to pay. Frederick Douglas said, "If there is no struggle there is no progress" and Power concedes nothing without a demand, it never did and it never will."
When I hear the word race in my daily walk it really does not effect how i navigate, but when I think, really think about the word race I think of unearned white male privilege, think about the dominate culture, think about the privatization of the prison complex, think about being a member of 2nd class classification, so I try not to think about Race.
It is important that we all think about race, even white people who are never affected by the Race word in their travels
It has been a key word in the battle cry of our elders, those who fought hard and long for racial equality, if there is such a touchable destination.
I grew up in an NAACP house, went to the March on Washington when I was 13, not understand the importance of the event, in 1958 was part of a IQ test case wrap around intelligence controversy, proving the test was cultural bias. Growing up in Red Hook Projects, Brooklyn, I only saw white people when I went to school. After moving to Brownsville when I was 14, I was part of population of students that was bussed to an all white HS, James Madison. So when I think about race it is a dark and stark place where I grew up.
Coming up in the age of aquarius, Hippie anti-vietnam era, I saw a change in how white people dealt with the race disparities, The very public killing of Martin and Malcolm showed all how dangerous the word Race is. It even got John and Robert killed. You know it dangerous when it gets white people killed. So yeah I try not to think about the word race, of course that is an impossible space for a black man in America.
So I applauded you Helen for keeping me thinking about race. I have years of narratives on the topic, I will return to you blog soon.
Sam, I thought I responded to this post before - please forgive me my brother! You are so right - the topic of race is ingrained in our daily lives (whether we want it to be or not). I always tell folks race is at the forefront of who I am as a woman. When my parents found out they were having a child (me) they didn't know if I would be a boy or a girl, but they knew I would be Black - so I am first Black, secondly a Woman...and so forth! The construct of race is as American as apple pie.
When I hear the word race i think of minority vs. the others....the minority being me and the others being the people of Caucasoid lineage. I think race affects how one is treated or mistreated, how one is served in a restaurant, how one is allowed into a venue, how one is followed or not followed in a department store or boutique,....etc. To think that the world is not separated by race is ludicrous....Race will always be a deciding factor on how someone is treated in society.
Karen - thanks for your feedback. I agree that Race plays a major role throughout the world in how people are viewed and treated. However, sadly there is far too much bias and prejudice based on race in the world.
I pray for change on a regular basis!!! I also pray that my people will wake up And see how we are destroying Our children Our future Our country Our world!!! I am more than sure That what we have become has Disappointed our ancestors!!! I love all people As my god tells me to do But I have more love for black people Yes first because I am Black And secondly for what we have had to endure From the moment we were enslaved and forced to come here!!! From my knowledge of history I can't recall Any race of people Who had to endure The things that we have endured From the first person loaded onto a slave shipTo the men women and children who were separated from their families in Africa To the families that were separated on the auction block Once we got here To my ancestors who were lynched and beaten half to death for looking at a white person in the eyes To the young female girls who were raped by their slave owners To the babies that were born and taken from their mothers at birth To be sold into slavery Two blacks in the 21st century Who are still being used as slaves in prisonsAnd also being killed Senselessly in the streets In the United States of America!!! GOD HELP US!!!
Charles, I also pray for change and I am optimistic that some things will change. Black people have historically endured so much abuse throughout the world - and are still subjected to inferior education, brainwashing, mental enslavement, major injustices, White supremacy, mass incarceration, etc. Yet, we are still here rooted in faith, standing on the shoulders of our ancestors, praying and believing in a better day!
Once I found out about black Wall StreetIt actually gave me New hope!!! And there are more than enough Wealthy black people in this countryTo make this happen Damn near overnight!!! The problems we are having in Chicago With a black children's education Oprah Winfrey Could afford to clean that mess up all by herself!!! She built a beautiful school in Africa Kudos to you Oprah!!! You are based out of Chicago!!! And it is to my understanding That you have invested money in to privatize prisons in this country Knowing that they're designed To destroy the black race!!! It's your money you spend it however you like One day you will stand before God in judgement If I was you I would pray that I don't have jury duty on that day!!! Thousands of extremely wealthy black people And shit can't get it done Y'ALL need to set it off The same way I was in Oklahoma Many years ago We could have it that same way bigger and better If All y'all put your money together and sell off You could make your investment back in no time oh well We are at the end of another day A day wasted
Wow, lots of memories pile up when I think about the word race: Honestly, ...my first thought when I read "what do you think of the word race" was about sports...now that is white privilege in action right there and also evidence of how I was raised. My mom had to stay a long time in the hospital when I was born due to injuries from a broken back and knees. When she came home, she was not allowed to pick me up for a long time I am told. My dad hired a woman to come in and take care of me during the day. She was deep brown and took care of me until I was 10. It was completely normal for me to have her in my life and I didn't know about racism, even though we lived in the South. Sometimes her husband would come by to pick her up and sometimes her kids to play with us in the back yard while she was finishing up... I was a young child and had the veil of white privilege in the South. I was protected from the ugliness of racism. I knew about her love and I loved her. We moved when I was 10 and I didn't understand the concept of moving until we pulled out of the driveway and she remained standing in it. I tried to climb out of the car window to get to her, screaming her name all the way to Jackson Mississippi, where we slept for the night. Even today I cry as I write this at the loss of Rosa from my life. One night, in about 1965 I was watching the news and it showed African Americans marching. The newscaster actually said "The n-'s are protesting in Alabama..." I had never heard that word and did not know of it's prejudicial meaning. That night, we were all watching TV together and Nat King Cole was on the Ed Sullivan Show. I wanted to use my new word so I said, "Look, It's a n-!" The hair on the back of my neck stood up as I heard the tone in my father's voice as he said "Vicki Lynn, come here." I knew something was very wrong as I walked across the room. He very seriously explained to me that word was one of the uglies words in the language and I was never, under any circumstances to use that word again to describe anyone. I promised him I would not and have kept that promise. I don't even feel comfortable using the phrase "the n word" or writing ''n-'' here because it makes us say that word in our minds and it is repugnant. About that same time, we went to a po-boy restaurant one night and there was a great deal of tension in the restaurant. I didn't know why, but I did notice that it was the first time I noticed an African American family in a restaurant. They were sitting to one side and everyone else was sitting on the other. My dad, of course, steered us over to right beside them. There was no food on their table and the servers were ignoring them. My dad ordered two of everything we ordered and when the food arrived he instructed the server to bring half of it over to the other family. She did so reluctantly, but did so. He explained to our curiosity that they were his guests and had been waiting for us there. I guess he was trying to protect us from the idea of racism.
My dear Vicki - Your post spoke so eloquently of the innocence of children! Children are naturally innocent, caring and accepting of everyone, it is what they are exposed to and/or taught (intentionally, through observation, and by virtue of the media) that changes their mindset and breeds mean-spirited behavior, biased thinking and racist practices. Thank God your parents allowed you to have a close and loving relationship with Rosa, which has touched you for a lifetime. Far too many White children were and are still raised by Black women and taught to disrespect and devalue them. (Historically, Black enslaved women were wet nurses to White children and when those children grew up they denigrated the woman who nursed them). I could never figure out why White slave owners who had no respect or value for these Black women chose them to nurse their children). What a ridiculous situation.
Your story is a great example of how just hearing a derogatory word on a powerful medium (television) resorted to you as a child, making the connection to another Black person and your innocent use of that word. It is a blessing that your father not only corrected you in the use of that work, but he also taught you how ugly and hurtful that word is. He further demonstrated support for Back people by the scenario in the restaurant. That took courage and the realization that he too could be targeted for supporting and helping a Black family. There is so much work to be done - and it all begins with love, care and respect for all of humanity. Thanks for sharing...
After we moved to North Alabama I began to grow up a bit and integration was just starting and I learned about racism. My dad's office was smoke bombed and a cross burned in front of it because he decided to serve both black and whites children (he was a pediatrician) on the same day out of the same waiting room, which was not an acceptable custom in that town. He kept doing it anyway. At a city council meeting, he and my mother were accused of being the k- who were inciting the n- to think they were equal. I later learned that one of my aunts used some connections she had with Lady Bird Johnson to get FBI agents assigned to protect them for a while. (Another long story) In school PE, being Jewish, they put me on the sports teams with all the black girls. We won just about everything and the local girls would call me n-lover and threaten to beat me up after school. My team mates would tell me to go home the other way and they would take care of it. I spent a lot of Friday and Saturday nights in high school at friend's houses in the projects and we had fun and danced and laughed and ate good food. They thought it was funny that a white girl could actually move her hips and keep rhythm and would call friends over to see. My first crush was a classmate from the projects. We wanted to go on a date but my dad cautioned us against it saying it would be very dangerous for the young man. He did not refuse us but asked us to think long and hard about taking on the repercussions of our actions. We decided to just meet quietly at study hall and pass notes. I clearly remember going home one day and seeing a car with classmates in it that had a rebel flag in the window and it suddenly hitting me that racists raise racist children and it wouldn't be ending in this generation. I was crushed by that realization. There are so many more memories as my folks were very active in the civil rights movement on a local level and it almost got my mom killed. Even with all that I grew up with though, I would not be honest if I did not admit that I have been conditioned by our culture and our news to be obliviously privileged and at times to react in subtle ways with more stereotypical impulses of the inner conditionings of growing up white in the American South. It sometimes feel like taking off layers of an onion...there is always another layer underneath to get aware of. Perhaps, because of how I grew up with Rosa, racists have always confused me. I find it hard to believe that people actually convince themselves of that crap. I have chosen, most of my adult life, to live in places where white culture is not the dominant culture.
The concept of race is so deep rooted in the very fabric of the United States. Until history is presented in a historically accurate, truthful manner through the eyes of all people these beliefs and denials surrounding White privilege will continue to fester. I think it is healthy to have respectful, yet open and brutally honest conversations about race, culture, privilege, discrimination, multiculturalism, language and what it all really means with diverse groups of people. We all have a story and can learn and grow from the dialogue with others. I agree with the onion example - the layers have been added over many years and generations and it takes work to get to our core...underneath, we all bleed red blood, all have the same basic needs for food, clothing, shelter, connection, etc... Glad we can and are having this conversation...
Two vivid childhood memories always come to mind for me. One day when I was 9 I was enjoying a ride in the car with my father when the news came over the radio that the body of a 14-year-old Negro boy named Emmett Till had been found after he’d been brutally tortured and lynched in Mississippi. My father, who had been smiling cheerfully a moment earlier as we drove past a pond full of ducks, had a look on his face I had never seen before. He was trying not to cry in front of me. As he choked up he looked at me and said, “Sometimes I’m ashamed to be white.” A happier memory is of a sunny afternoon when I was around the same age and my father took me to Ebbets Field to see the Brooklyn Dodgers play. He pointed to Jackie Robinson and said, “That man is very special. One day you will understand and I want you to remember.” Thank you for embarking on this project, Helen. Only good can come from education and dialogue. I suggest that Joy DeGruy be “required reading” for Race 101 (especially for white folks). There are some great clips on Youtube. A good sample is the one called A Trip to the Grocery Store from her film Cracking the Codes: The System of Racial Inequity.
ReplyDeleteMichael, Thanks for sharing your stories. Your experiences led you to become a conscious, open-minded, caring individual who is committed to justice; and who raised daughters who embody that same spirit. I am thankful to call you a friend, and honored to have taught two of your girls. I feel it is so critical to have honest, "gut-wrenchingly" honest conversations about race across diverse lines. We all have to look at life through multiple lenses to even begin to understand different experiences. I really hope this blog stimulates dialogue, and becomes a platform for sharing information and resources!! Thanks for the youtube suggestions. Peace!!
ReplyDeleteShare your thoughts folks...
ReplyDeleteHelen thank you for inviting me!!! WOW Michael Kaufman your story touch me I have a very similar story from the same time. I was 4 maybe 5 years old playing on the kitchen floor as I always did and my mother was in the living room watching TV I heard her scream oh my god I ran to the living room to see her crying President John F Kennedy had just been assassinated I started to cry because my family spoke very highly of this man black Americans love him he was a very decent human being in my home there were several adults and as a child I would frequently hear them talking about Martin Luther King the civil rights movement voting President Kennedy Malcolm X and as a young child I became aware of these people and what they did what they stood for and what they meant so it also touched me very deeply I believe in my heart today some fifty years later Kennedy part of the reason he was assassinated what he was going to go against the powers that be and sign in to affect the civil rights bill what he was going to do a lot more than that so they got rid of him the only way to shut him up was to assassinate him!!! not during that era we will hung from trees we had dogs attack us we were treated like s*** spit upon not allowed to eat in certain restaurants not allowed to drink from certain water fountains certain place we went to we had to use the back door we were not allowed to go to the front door as I said some things have changed not a great deal of change we are still treated as second-class citizens and what's worse we are being shot in the street in numbers that I ridiculous it is a sign of blatant racism and all police departments all across the country driving while black has become a popular phrase because it is a real thing I myself have been stopped several times not having done anything wrong but because I am Black!!! how this can be changed that's why I'm here hopefully we can come together and find a solution!!! I think it should start with the rulers of all land our politicians the people we elected into office who we trust to have a best interest at heart its not that way congressman and senators should be allowed only a two year term the Supreme Court judges should only be allowed a five-year term!!! we should start there that's my opinion all police officers should be scrutinized when they act unbecoming to the public they should be penalized they should go to jail just as anyone else would if the law has been broken and they break the law quite frequently!!! hopefully in this blog we can collectively come together and make some kind of change that is my prayer and I will continue to hold on to that hope and that dream
ReplyDeleteI consider myself fortunate when I was a infant my mother was a domestic worker in Englewood Cliffs she work for a German Jew not a very nice man but his wife was a very sweet woman I have known her into my adulthood!!! my mother didn't have a babysitter and many times she would take me to work with her the woman of the housealso had twins a boy and the girl these two little white children for babies where my playmates I played with them all day long up until kindergarten when we played together we had a lot of fun they even had sleepovers at the house where I was the only black person in the house these are my friends my playmates so for my early age I did not know racism and I don't have it in my spirit today I find myself very fortunate to have grown up in that environment I think God because if not I have no idea how I would feel towards white people today I don't have any racism in me there are some black people I can't stand there are some people I don't like but all in all I don't consider that racism because I don't look at their color of their skin
ReplyDeleteCharles, Thanks for your response and honesty! I too remember my parents reactions (sad, mad, worried) when Malcolm X, President Kennedy, Martin Luther King Jr., Bobby Kennedy & Medgar Evans were all assassinated! The Kennedy brothers were recognized as White people who cared and were willing to make a difference for Black people. We lost so many good people in that era. My parents raised us to know we were just as good as the next person, and to be able to stand eye to eye and face anyone, and I thank them immensely for that teaching. My family and I have endured our share (more than I care to remember) of driving while Black stops & police brutality at the hands of White officers. Yet, I still treat people as individuals & work to build bridges across diverse lines! I like your ideas about terms for elected officials and judges. I also think police officers should have to live in the community where they work (not just the city). Finally regarding race, in reality there is only one race - human and we all evolved from Africans - which has been anthropologically documented - Lucy (the oldest bones) was a Black, African woman!! I hope this blog will get people talking - which is the first step towards addressing issues!
ReplyDeleteAMEN!!! I have often wondered had those men who are not assassinated during that era had all the ads to be elderly men today our country would be a lot different it would still be some hatred but it would be I don't know the words to use it will be I'll just say a better place I believe that in my heart those men we're not evil men!!! every name you mentioned were men of integrity we're men of consciousnesswere men who cares for their fellow man!!!
ReplyDeleteI do a lot of talk texting so forgive my miss wording sometime I need to do more editing but I think you get the gist of what I'm saying!!! LOL
ReplyDeletethere's several people we know I'm going to invite to this blog I'm actually asking your permission may I invite them please?
ReplyDeleteNo judgment on spelling, grammar or typing errors - the content is what counts! I too believe our country would be a better place if those great men and many women too had lived (Fannie Lou Hamer to name one) and were able to work together for the cause of freedom, justice & equality! However, I believe in a higher power and there are no accidents - so things were meant to unfold with divine timing! I believe we are on the brink of a new world order!!!
ReplyDeletePlease feel free to invite people to join this dialogue!
yes a new world order!!! my question ordered by who??? and my sincere apology they were many great women in the struggle and they're still out today what can I leave you ladies out had it not been for you ladies I will not be here!!! LOL
ReplyDeleteI think a new world order ordained by God is emerging!
ReplyDeleteCulturally I feel we have come far, yet still remains a problem of divide and conquer. Minds
ReplyDeletehttp://sfist.com/2015/01/04/man_beaten_by_plainclothes_sfpd_for.php
DeleteNicole, I agree racially and culturally in some respects we have made progress, but we have a long way to go. Today resegregation is occurring in schools all over the US; and Black and Hispanic students are more and more isolated in low-income, racially segregated schools. In all major cities of America the rates of segregation are close to what they were in the early 60’s. I firmly believe until everyone can experience the same freedom, justice, and equality than none of us are truly free. In terms of the link you posted, it is an absolute shame! I see links and posts of police brutality and race-targeted crimes daily. (In fact, my family and I have experienced it more times than I care to remember). People nationwide/worldwide are tired of the blatant disparity and racist treatment, and banning together to express their outrage in a variety of ways. I think a major movement is emerging that will demand - not suggest - but demand a wide-sweeping, revolutionary change of the "system" in this country. I don't think it will come easy and I anticipate there will be a heavy price to pay. Frederick Douglas said, "If there is no struggle there is no progress" and Power concedes nothing without a demand, it never did and it never will."
DeleteAMEN TO THAT!!!
ReplyDeleteWhen I hear the word race in my daily walk it really does not effect how i navigate, but when I think, really think about the word race I think of unearned white male privilege, think about the dominate culture, think about the privatization of the prison complex, think about being a member of 2nd class classification, so I try not to think about Race.
ReplyDeleteIt is important that we all think about race, even white people who are never affected by the Race word in their travels
It has been a key word in the battle cry of our elders, those who fought hard and long for racial equality, if there is such a touchable destination.
I grew up in an NAACP house, went to the March on Washington when I was 13, not understand the importance of the event, in 1958 was part of a IQ test case wrap around intelligence controversy, proving the test was cultural bias. Growing up in Red Hook Projects, Brooklyn, I only saw white people when I went to school. After moving to Brownsville when I was 14, I was part of population of students that was bussed to an all white HS, James Madison. So when I think about race it is a dark and stark place where I grew up.
Coming up in the age of aquarius, Hippie anti-vietnam era, I saw a change in how white people dealt with the race disparities, The very public killing of Martin and Malcolm showed all how dangerous the word Race is. It even got John and Robert killed. You know it dangerous when it gets white people killed. So yeah I try not to think about the word race, of course that is an impossible space for a black man in America.
So I applauded you Helen for keeping me thinking about race. I have years of narratives on the topic, I will return to you blog soon.
Sam, I thought I responded to this post before - please forgive me my brother! You are so right - the topic of race is ingrained in our daily lives (whether we want it to be or not). I always tell folks race is at the forefront of who I am as a woman. When my parents found out they were having a child (me) they didn't know if I would be a boy or a girl, but they knew I would be Black - so I am first Black, secondly a Woman...and so forth! The construct of race is as American as apple pie.
DeleteWhen I hear the word race i think of minority vs. the others....the minority being me and the others being the people of Caucasoid lineage. I think race affects how one is treated or mistreated, how one is served in a restaurant, how one is allowed into a venue, how one is followed or not followed in a department store or boutique,....etc. To think that the world is not separated by race is ludicrous....Race will always be a deciding factor on how someone is treated in society.
ReplyDeleteKaren - thanks for your feedback. I agree that Race plays a major role throughout the world in how people are viewed and treated. However, sadly there is far too much bias and prejudice based on race in the world.
DeleteI pray for change on a regular basis!!! I also pray that my people will wake up And see how we are destroying Our children Our future Our country Our world!!! I am more than sure That what we have become has Disappointed our ancestors!!! I love all people As my god tells me to do But I have more love for black people Yes first because I am Black And secondly for what we have had to endure From the moment we were enslaved and forced to come here!!! From my knowledge of history I can't recall Any race of people Who had to endure The things that we have endured From the first person loaded onto a slave shipTo the men women and children who were separated from their families in Africa To the families that were separated on the auction block Once we got here To my ancestors who were lynched and beaten half to death for looking at a white person in the eyes To the young female girls who were raped by their slave
ReplyDeleteowners To the babies that were born and taken from their mothers at birth To be sold into slavery Two blacks in the 21st century Who are still being used as slaves in prisonsAnd also being killed Senselessly
in the streets In the United States of America!!! GOD HELP US!!!
Charles, I also pray for change and I am optimistic that some things will change. Black people have historically endured so much abuse throughout the world - and are still subjected to inferior education, brainwashing, mental enslavement, major injustices, White supremacy, mass incarceration, etc. Yet, we are still here rooted in faith, standing on the shoulders of our ancestors, praying and believing in a better day!
DeleteOnce I found out about black Wall StreetIt actually gave me New hope!!! And there are more than enough Wealthy black people in this countryTo make this happen Damn near overnight!!! The problems we are having in Chicago With a black children's education Oprah Winfrey Could afford to clean that mess up all by herself!!! She built a beautiful school in Africa Kudos to you Oprah!!! You are based out of Chicago!!! And it is to my understanding That you have invested money in to privatize prisons in this country Knowing that they're designed To destroy the black race!!! It's your money you spend it however you like One day you will stand before God in judgement If I was you I would pray that I don't have jury duty on that day!!! Thousands of extremely wealthy black people And shit can't get it done Y'ALL need to set it off The same way I was in Oklahoma Many years ago We could have it that same way bigger and better If All y'all put your money together and sell off You could make your investment back in no time oh well We are at the end of another day A day wasted
DeleteWow, lots of memories pile up when I think about the word race: Honestly, ...my first thought when I read "what do you think of the word race" was about sports...now that is white privilege in action right there and also evidence of how I was raised.
ReplyDeleteMy mom had to stay a long time in the hospital when I was born due to injuries from a broken back and knees. When she came home, she was not allowed to pick me up for a long time I am told. My dad hired a woman to come in and take care of me during the day. She was deep brown and took care of me until I was 10. It was completely normal for me to have her in my life and I didn't know about racism, even though we lived in the South. Sometimes her husband would come by to pick her up and sometimes her kids to play with us in the back yard while she was finishing up... I was a young child and had the veil of white privilege in the South. I was protected from the ugliness of racism. I knew about her love and I loved her.
We moved when I was 10 and I didn't understand the concept of moving until we pulled out of the driveway and she remained standing in it. I tried to climb out of the car window to get to her, screaming her name all the way to Jackson Mississippi, where we slept for the night. Even today I cry as I write this at the loss of Rosa from my life.
One night, in about 1965 I was watching the news and it showed African Americans marching. The newscaster actually said "The n-'s are protesting in Alabama..." I had never heard that word and did not know of it's prejudicial meaning. That night, we were all watching
TV together and Nat King Cole was on the Ed Sullivan Show. I wanted to use my new word so I said, "Look, It's a n-!" The hair on the back of my neck stood up as I heard the tone in my father's voice as he said "Vicki Lynn, come here." I knew something was very wrong as I walked across the room. He very seriously explained to me that word was one of the uglies words in the language and I was never, under any circumstances to use that word again to describe anyone. I promised him I would not and have kept that promise. I don't even feel comfortable using the phrase "the n word" or writing ''n-'' here because it makes us say that word in our minds and it is repugnant.
About that same time, we went to a po-boy restaurant one night and there was a great deal of tension in the restaurant. I didn't know why, but I did notice that it was the first time I noticed an African American family in a restaurant. They were sitting to one side and everyone else was sitting on the other. My dad, of course, steered us over to right beside them. There was no food on their table and the servers were ignoring them. My dad ordered two of everything we ordered and when the food arrived he instructed the server to bring half of it over to the other family. She did so reluctantly, but did so. He explained to our curiosity that they were his guests and had been waiting for us there. I guess he was trying to protect us from the idea of racism.
My dear Vicki - Your post spoke so eloquently of the innocence of children! Children are naturally innocent, caring and accepting of everyone, it is what they are exposed to and/or taught (intentionally, through observation, and by virtue of the media) that changes their mindset and breeds mean-spirited behavior, biased thinking and racist practices. Thank God your parents allowed you to have a close and loving relationship with Rosa, which has touched you for a lifetime. Far too many White children were and are still raised by Black women and taught to disrespect and devalue them.
Delete(Historically, Black enslaved women were wet nurses to White children and when those children grew up they denigrated the woman who nursed them). I could never figure out why White slave owners who had no respect or value for these Black women chose them to nurse their children). What a ridiculous situation.
Your story is a great example of how just hearing a derogatory word on a powerful medium (television) resorted to you as a child, making the connection to another Black person and your innocent use of that word. It is a blessing that your father not only corrected you in the use of that work, but he also taught you how ugly and hurtful that word is. He further demonstrated support for Back people by the scenario in the restaurant. That took courage and the realization that he too could be targeted for supporting and helping a Black family. There is so much work to be done - and it all begins with love, care and respect for all of humanity. Thanks for sharing...
After we moved to North Alabama I began to grow up a bit and integration was just starting and I learned about racism. My dad's office was smoke bombed and a cross burned in front of it because he decided to serve both black and whites children (he was a pediatrician) on the same day out of the same waiting room, which was not an acceptable custom in that town. He kept doing it anyway. At a city council meeting, he and my mother were accused of being the k- who were inciting the n- to think they were equal. I later learned that one of my aunts used some connections she had with Lady Bird Johnson to get FBI agents assigned to protect them for a while. (Another long story)
ReplyDeleteIn school PE, being Jewish, they put me on the sports teams with all the black girls. We won just about everything and the local girls would call me n-lover and threaten to beat me up after school. My team mates would tell me to go home the other way and they would take care of it.
I spent a lot of Friday and Saturday nights in high school at friend's houses in the projects and we had fun and danced and laughed and ate good food. They thought it was funny that a white girl could actually move her hips and keep rhythm and would call friends over to see.
My first crush was a classmate from the projects. We wanted to go on a date but my dad cautioned us against it saying it would be very dangerous for the young man. He did not refuse us but asked us to think long and hard about taking on the repercussions of our actions. We decided to just meet quietly at study hall and pass notes.
I clearly remember going home one day and seeing a car with classmates in it that had a rebel flag in the window and it suddenly hitting me that racists raise racist children and it wouldn't be ending in this generation. I was crushed by that realization. There are so many more memories as my folks were very active in the civil rights movement on a local level and it almost got my mom killed. Even with all that I grew up with though, I would not be honest if I did not admit that I have been conditioned by our culture and our news to be obliviously privileged and at times to react in subtle ways with more stereotypical impulses of the inner conditionings of growing up white in the American South. It sometimes feel like taking off layers of an onion...there is always another layer underneath to get aware of.
Perhaps, because of how I grew up with Rosa, racists have always confused me. I find it hard to believe that people actually convince themselves of that crap. I have chosen, most of my adult life, to live in places where white culture is not the dominant culture.
The concept of race is so deep rooted in the very fabric of the United States. Until history is presented in a historically accurate, truthful manner through the eyes of all people these beliefs and denials surrounding White privilege will continue to fester. I think it is healthy to have respectful, yet open and brutally honest conversations about race, culture, privilege, discrimination, multiculturalism, language and what it all really means with diverse groups of people. We all have a story and can learn and grow from the dialogue with others. I agree with the onion example - the layers have been added over many years and generations and it takes work to get to our core...underneath, we all bleed red blood, all have the same basic needs for food, clothing, shelter, connection, etc... Glad we can and are having this conversation...
Delete